Yes, I admit that I suck at communicating with people face to face. Yes, I admit that I may have problems as judged from the external.
My dad always tell me whenever I respond to him, I have the rude intent. Is it?
Some of those reasons are explainable from my side. Okay so when it comes to text communication, I would usually try to prolong one conversation no matter what. Ended up what happens? The other party stops first and I really hate that to happen. For this, I am just following the flow this time round.
Talking about face-to-face communications and this is where I am bad at. Here I am trying to self-enrich so I can speak somewhat better and upon learning the skills, I realised I don't have someone new that I know of to apply it.
Sure opening up a conversation is as easy as using the open words like Who, What, When, Where, Why and How but directing such questions to ladies will lead me thinking extra like "Okay, how can I humour her?", "How can I be interesting?", etc.. I apply too much logic to conversations maybe until to the point it felt anti-climax inside me. It totally shatters my will to talk. Because of being logical, I am characterised to think 2-3 times before I do ANYTHING, that includes communication (Chinese idiom calls it 三思而行).
My past has that hate-everyone-to-the-core attitude (愤世嫉俗) and this is probably why I have a hard time. I have already abolished this attitude and trying hard to change for the better. Also there's this situation whereby when my throat gets dry, I won't have any intention to talk at all.
I am a Kinesthetic person, saying that it means I feel more than listen and see and I alter what I see and listen into feelings (This is why I love Trance music so much). Is that any good? Maybe. My research tells me that Kinesthetic people are SLOW.
Can I change or get rid of those shortcomings? It may appear that my change was a little forward, but here I am thinking that it all went back down to default again.
This is yet another of my entry. It's been sometime since I wrote my feelings.
